Keeping Our Priorities

Sunday night I spoke with a veteran player on the Los Angeles Rams football team. Of course, the Rams just won the Super Bowl last month, a great achievement. I’ve previously reflected on my own experience in winning a Super Bowl (albeit nineteen years ago).  

The player and I were connected by a mutual friend, and I was looking forward to getting to know him and learn some of his thoughts on leadership, team work, and other subjects. It took a few days for us to connect, exacerbated by the difference in our time zones. But beyond that, he was pretty busy. Not with parades or autograph sessions, but with “trivial” things. The first date and time that I suggested, he was busy: playing golf with two teammates. The second and third times I offered, his family was having dinner with neighbors, then he was filling in to coach his child’s little league team at practice, respectively. The fourth… 

You get the picture. 

It all worked out after a few attempts, but the process reminded me of Tony Dungy’s comments to his Buccaneers and Colts teams based on Matthew 16:26 - “What does it profit someone to gain the whole world but lose their soul?” 

The player clearly hadn’t lost sight of what mattered to him. Friends, family, hobbies, time spent together. 

Put another way, whoever you are before you attain your goals is who you will still be after you’ve achieved them. If you’ve put aside family relationships to lead your organization, those relationships won’t suddenly be restored when you’ve hit your corporate goals. If you haven’t been a person whose word carries weight when you manage your team, you won’t suddenly be a person of integrity once the team’s goals are achieved. 

(quote often attributed to Allen Saunders) 

I don’t know that we need to try and “balance” all the aspects of our lives perfectly. There may be seasons of life when our occupation demands more of our time, or family illnesses that keep us from other obligations. But I believe that if we remain focused on our priorities and how to best meet needs, create value, and find quality - and quantity - time with each, we won’t lose out on the life that is happening while we’re on our way to something else. 

Otherwise, if we lose sight of the rest of our lives as we’re headed toward that pinnacle we think will make our lives complete, well, it may be a hollow victory. 

In talking with that longtime veteran NFL player who finally achieved his professional pinnacle with the Rams, even before we came to any discussions on the things I’d initially thought were my purpose in speaking with him, I came to appreciate that he was particularly enjoying the win mainly because it brought out the richness in other aspects of his life. 

It didn’t create meaning, it emphasized it.  

An important distinction, and one to keep in mind as we lead or are led.  

Where are we going? is a critical question to ask. Without vision, we’re lost. To the archer without a target, releasing the arrow in any direction is equally valid.  

But I believe just as important are the questions, How are we getting there, and who is along for the journey? 

As the late Stephen Covey put it, Keep the main thing the main thing. 

Priorities matter. Don’t lose sight of yours.