Today, we did our midterm presentation for our “Enhancing Professional Interchange” class.
Because we could pretty much talk about anything for 3 minutes, I decided to build up on my previous post (see here). The idea came to me while cleaning up a mess I made, another ‘stupid moment’ (long story). Anyway, the speech was pretty much positively accepted, maybe because everyone feels a little bit stupid sometimes. Anyway, I just wanted to share it with you. Enjoy!
Note: Speech is just for fun. Not a recommended (or credible) source for an argument. The IQ points are real though. See URL of sources below.
I urge everyone to pay close attention. There is a conspiracy going on in business schools everywhere. I believe they were created to make people dumber.
Exhibit A is standing and talking in front of you right now.
Last week, I spent several minutes looking for my phone which I swore I was holding just moments earlier. You know where the phone was. It never left my hands!
We will talk about how business schools reduce our IQs by e-mail, by our subjects and lessons, and by reducing our time for sleep.
How do these strategies work? Here’s how.
Business schools make us dumb by bombarding us with e-mails and with different online accounts: webmail, FisherConnect, the Accepted Student Gateway, MBA Focus, The Hub, and LinkedIn.
A study in the UK has proven that the constant influx of e-mails can seriously reduce a person’s ability to focus on tasks. The average IQ was reduced by 10 points – double the amount seen in studies involving marijuana users.
That’s 10 points down. Let us now find out how our subjects affect us.
Information overload, also known as “too much to study in a short period of time”, also lowers IQ.
Business schools make us dumber by letting us study and learn all these different concepts and theories in a short time. A too-full brain can cause one to make mistakes, forget to do something, lose creativity, get stressed out, or experience a total breakdown. Researchers have also found the information overload reduces by 10 IQ points.
Our IQ is now down by 20 points. The last point is related to the first points mentioned. With all the e-mails and lessons we have to study, we have less time in our schedule to get sleep.
People who lack sleep are at risk of becoming mentally-retarded. Business schools keep us from sleeping to lower our IQ more. Another study in the UK reports that “each hour short of eight hours of sleep a night could knock one point off a person’s IQ. It would be easy to lose fifteen points in a week, resulting in a person with an IQ of 100 becoming borderline retarded.”
So, business schools try to keep us awake as long as they can.
Anyone who loses just 35 IQ points is lucky he did not lose more.
I reiterate my theory: business schools are out to make us dumb. They do it by sending us millions of e-mails and letting us study a lot so we lose hours of sleep.
What questions do you have?